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What are the consequences of devaluing feelings?
Why do people around us sometimes devalue our feelings and experiences? And what are the consequences of such behavior?
Surely each of you has encountered situations when someone close or not very close said something like: “Well, why be upset? It’s not worth it, just forget about it! Let’s be honest: did you feel better after these words? No, it was getting worse.
And why? Because not only did they not support, but they did not even recognize our feelings, they rejected them. The most unpleasant thing is that this happens in absolutely all areas of a person’s life, poisoning his life.
Why were you devalued?
You probably want to stay with the idea that they simply don’t love you, be offended, and never again communicate with someone who devalued you. But let’s first find out what mental mechanism makes a person devalue?
That’s right, protective! What does a person protect himself from? From your own discomfort, which may be caused by your experiences. After all, we all have empathy to varying degrees. And when someone talks about their problems, we involuntarily begin to remember our own. And this is unpleasant…
By devaluing the experiences of another, we seem to refuse to “dig” into our own. At least for some period of time. Believe…
