How psychotherapy works

When difficulties arise, often the first thing a person does is seek to find answers in psychological articles on the Internet. Sometimes he even finds it. Sometimes you come across conclusions in the style: you need to love yourself and raise your self-esteem. Goes to love yourself. Goes to raise self-esteem. But the situation is not resolved, changes do not occur…

Why is that?

Man is the creature with the longest period of development before the separation stage. We develop throughout our lives in contact with other people. All relationships from childhood directly influence the set of our behavioral reactions in adulthood. More precisely, childhood relationships lay the foundation of our individuality in the future. And no matter how much we would like to decide everything ourselves (“what’s wrong with my reactions”), changing them is only possible in contact with a person (with a person specially trained for this, who has undergone personal therapy, group training and has a theoretical basis; this has been going on for many years labor, work to understand oneself and people).

As children, we all actively learned something, what is possible, what is needed, what is not, etc. We comprehended something, “experienced” it, understood it; and they swallowed something in a huge piece, without even understanding why this was so, why. For example, a girl is told: “You can’t be angry, it’s ugly.” The child doesn’t understand, why not? what happens if I get angry? This is simply an unspoken prohibition that is not…